The negative impact you may have on your children in Youth Sports.
We at Miami WMB Training Center decided to write about this topic because we have first- hand knowledge of how this can affect children in the worst of ways. Our Brazilian Jiu Jitsu kid’s competition team is some of the highest level competitors in the world and we see the negative impact some parents can have on their children. The troubling fact is that although the behavior is triggered by sports; the underlying issue is parenting. Many parents portray troubling behavior with criticism, name calling, negative feedback, yelling etc.; as they try to live their own dream through their children.
Some parents may have a hard time reading this because they will see similarities in their own behavior while interacting with their children.
Parent thinking #1- “We show up to support our children every day and try to help them focus and pay attention.”
Well, sort of; actually not really. You are more of a distraction. Most of the time you attend you are probably talking (loudly), laughing, taking phone calls or trying to coach your child in a sport that you probably never played. I’m sure you get the picture. Parents think they know enough to question coaches and officials. This is destructive to the overall purpose because 99 percent of the time, you don’t know as much as even your children playing the sport. If you step into the coach’s role; the coach will be forced to step in to the parent role to correct YOUR behavior. They parents are often just part time viewers and not practitioners; they tell themselves they are full time experts. Again, 99 Percent of the time; they have no idea of what is going on.
Parent thinking #2- “We know everything there is to know about the sport.”
Well. Again, not really. Watching it on TV or from the sideline seats doesn’t nearly qualify you as experts in educating them about the sport. Most of the time, your instruction is counter- productive to the overall success of the athlete (your child). In addition you don’t know the proper technical details, fitness, or rules to properly educate the athlete. Saying things like do this or do that confuses the athlete because coach already gave him instructions but you are the parent so knowing which advice to follow can be sometimes a daunting task. This may come as a surprise to most parents; however; the best advice for the athlete as it pertains to the sport is that of the coach and not yours.
Parent thinking #3- “My child is having a great experience.”
They certainly can have a good experience. Sports should be fun yet many children leave PRACTICE SESSIONS crying. Why is that? The parent ruined it. Your negative comments and pressure you build day to day with the child does not make it fun. Most of these children will never reach full potential and it will be because of this dynamic placed on them by the parent.
Parent thinking #4- “I have made a major financial investment in my child to play this sport.”
This may be true but there is no guarantee on your investment. In addition; don’t throw that back in your child’s face. Investing in your child is what you are SUPPOSED to do but it doesn’t give you the go ahead to criticize and put the athlete down. At the end of the day you have to choose; continue and have the athlete hate you and quit or choose to have the athlete (your child) in the best mental position to win both in the sport and in life.
We hope this article by Miami MWB Training Center sheds on light on how poor some parents can be as it pertains to athletes in youth sports. Supportive things, encouragement, give positive suggestions, ask the coach etc.; are all things you can do to try defusing your thoughts and disappointments. The athlete is not trying to perform badly. They are trying their best as well.
Content created by Javill Byron, philanthropist and entrepreneur. Much of this work in this field he has done for free to help the families who need it most. For more information about Javill Byron please visit :
Written by: Javill Byron and javillbyron.com